I have pondered a lot on the way my life is going and I feel that it’s now coming a full circle. Earlier, Ishaan would chase after me and woo me and now I am running after him, trying to get him to remember me and fall in love with me all over again. Life seems to be teaching me a few things and I sure am learning a lot.
Among many lessons I have learnt, one is to keep perseverance. Sure in life, when you keep trying and don’t get the end result, you want to give up – Don’t do that. I have kept up my flirting with Ishaan as I saw results. Now, he doesn’t throw me out of his room as quickly as he used to. Perhaps like dadi said, he is getting used to seeing me around him and accepting me in some small way. Yet, he doesn’t let go of a single excuse to run away from me either which hurts but I focus on the positive – that he stays with me longer than he used to. I have learnt that you get used to people over a period of time, if placed in close proximity. Maybe it was wishful thinking, or perhaps my intuition but I felt traces of our old memories in his eyes, when I forced him to apply nail polish on my hands last week. He kept looking at me like he used to so I didn’t even question him on what he was thinking. Was he remembering the past when he applied nail polish to me happily? I really, really hope so.
Later, Meena suggested a lovely idea to be in close proximity with Ishaan. We ended up removing one button each from all his shirts, so that he has to call me to stitch it. I had a lovely time performing my wifely duties and sewing a button on his shirt. This time, yet again, I felt Ishaan looking at me in a puzzled fashion and I saw my husband for a fleeting moment. I have taken tips from Dadaji and Dadiji and I can’t wait to romance Ishaan in the old fashioned way. I have learnt that small trivial things, like a gajra from a husband, is romantic. And a gesture of love doesn’t have to be a big deal.
I also learnt that memory is a powerful tool. The heart never forgets which is why when Ishaan and I couldn’t sleep and ended up on the terrace, I was surprised and delighted to know he dreamt of a girl called Suhana. He told me he wants to remember her as he is sure he loved Suhana a lot and she loved him too. He shared his worry that Suhana must be somewhere waiting for him. I was elated at his concern. I was teary eyed when I heard that. He mentioned all bad qualities of Suhana but when I was about to get angry, he said he saw the goodness in Suhana too. It has been so long since I heard my name from his lips. SUHANA, I never felt I would be giddy at the thought of my beloved simply calling my name out loud. Oh! I, sure, have become melodramatic. Ishaan even mentioned Boltanganj, so I feel we are getting somewhere.
I also learnt it doesn’t take much to make someone smile. Dadaji’s sister, Sharda Bua who came for a visit spoilt everyone’s mood at home. She insulted Radha bua, saying she brought ill omen into our family and is unlucky. She said due to her presence, Ishaan had an accident and I had a tumour. I was furious at her taunts and retaliated. I am glad Dadiji asked Sharda Bua to leave. I later cheered up an upset Radha with Ishaan’s help. Some filmy dialogues later, Radha bua was all smiles. It felt so lovely to give someone the gift of a smile. It is so priceless.
I also learnt that good memories can be painful and hurtful when the person you love isn’t with you. With Ishaan not beside me all the time, the letters and notes he used to write to me, before leaving for office, provide me with some solace. While reading them, I got emotional and began crying as I was missing Ishaan a lot. Though he is in front of me, he doesn’t remember me and is not with me and it’s a very painful situation to be in.
Have you had any similar experiences? Do share them with me at suhana@starplus.in and do write in with your advice and suggestions. Meanwhile, don’t forget to watch Sasural Genda Phool every Monday to Friday at 7.30 pm only on STAR Plus.
No comments:
Post a Comment